Monday, April 4, 2011

What a Week.

It's been a long time since I last posted, and I can't honestly say that I stayed on track while I was away. Instead, I gorged. I ate too much too often, and it showed on the scale. I gained two pounds.
Yet I avoided the gym anyway, and when I promised myself I'd eat well, I went to the cafeteria and ate a beef and cheese quesadilla. Healthy, huh?
But I finally got a wake-up call. This weekend, I toured my first wedding venue. As I looked around at the gorgeous Victorian-style mansion, I was astounded at the beauty around me...and I wanted to be a part of it. I realized that I want to fit my decor in my own eyes. The wedding consultant said "every bride and every wedding is beautiful". I know that's true, but...I can't help it, I don't like looking in the mirror and seeing what I see. I do like myself, I really do! I just don't like my body with all its lumps, bumps, and extra  large tendencies "curves". I fear wedding dress shopping because my dream gowns are NOT exactly forgiving. I fear walking into a store where they look up my measurements on a size chart and look at me again with widened, judging eyes.
I don't want that. On my wedding day, I want to make myself feel like the most lovely woman in the world. So, I'm back at it. I've started the SlimFast diet, and I've returned to the gym. I've been good for the past couple days, although I did succumb once-and I plan to continue. In the town I attend college in, there is a little ice cream shop that opens seasonally, and it's my weakness! 250 flavors of soft serve....who can resist? Not me!
To anyone reading can do it if I can. We can do this! It's a journey, and it's not a fun one, but the destination is the most incredible place in the whole world: true happiness within yourself!